I'm gonna let you in on a little secret... I love booze!
Sometimes (as in 3-4 days a week) I really do wanna go where everybody knows my name. Those Cheers people had the right idea. I love Ireland's 32! Food: Good, People: Good, Beer: Gooooooood, Bartenders: Awesome. Location is perfect for me because it's walking distance so I can stumble home after a crazy Sunday night. Yes, I said Sunday (no judgement please). I've spent entire days here, it kinda feels like my second living room.
Better stop myself here; I don't want to talk it up too much because then you might all start going here and that may ruin it for me.
Suffice it to say it's true love, and true love lasts a lifetime.
Showing posts with label Places that support our habits.... Show all posts
Showing posts with label Places that support our habits.... Show all posts
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Review of Suite 181:
Sometimes I like to escape from my privileged life.... and their ain't no place like the TL to do it. It is important and it builds character. I need a little danger in my life. There are times when the girls and I wanna practice our Matrix and Heartbeat moves and walk it out, walk it out, walk it out. . We just wanted to "get down" (read that last part again in a Lil John voice) to some rap music.
Well, more often than not, we like to watch sexy thuggish guys shine their shoes and two step.
So with reviews like these, why not Suite 181?! The two star review would deter most people, but no, not us. It amplified the appeal. The cab pulled up right in front. We didn't get out. "Where is it?" Cab driver pointed right outside. But it just looked like your average crack whore row. "Your joking, right?" We actually thought he was joking with us. Cab driver had a good laugh at us four white girls too scared to get out of the car. Then we all just started laughing. That "excited, scared, what are we doing, omg like we are actually going in here" laugh. He wished us "good luck" and away we went.
I would not pay to come here. Ever. We were on the guest list, and actually got ready at a decent hour, so we made it in time. There were some impressive dancers here, we definitely were not one of them, but we did pick up a few pointers. It is definitely a once a year kind of place. There are some things so special they should only happen once a year. Mind you, I use "special" with a broad interpretation. If I had paid to get in, I may be hating a bit more. Basically I will try anything once, and if it is free, I may even try it twice.
My guess is the people who have fun at this club don't Yelp. Is that bad to say? Am I generalizing? Well don't most of you people live in the Marina and the "inner" mission? Come on, be honest. No, No, I kid, I love you guys!! But really.
I saw a guy here in a full purple suit, gator shoes, and shutter shades, and that is A-ok with me.
Well, more often than not, we like to watch sexy thuggish guys shine their shoes and two step.
So with reviews like these, why not Suite 181?! The two star review would deter most people, but no, not us. It amplified the appeal. The cab pulled up right in front. We didn't get out. "Where is it?" Cab driver pointed right outside. But it just looked like your average crack whore row. "Your joking, right?" We actually thought he was joking with us. Cab driver had a good laugh at us four white girls too scared to get out of the car. Then we all just started laughing. That "excited, scared, what are we doing, omg like we are actually going in here" laugh. He wished us "good luck" and away we went.
I would not pay to come here. Ever. We were on the guest list, and actually got ready at a decent hour, so we made it in time. There were some impressive dancers here, we definitely were not one of them, but we did pick up a few pointers. It is definitely a once a year kind of place. There are some things so special they should only happen once a year. Mind you, I use "special" with a broad interpretation. If I had paid to get in, I may be hating a bit more. Basically I will try anything once, and if it is free, I may even try it twice.
My guess is the people who have fun at this club don't Yelp. Is that bad to say? Am I generalizing? Well don't most of you people live in the Marina and the "inner" mission? Come on, be honest. No, No, I kid, I love you guys!! But really.
I saw a guy here in a full purple suit, gator shoes, and shutter shades, and that is A-ok with me.
Review of 7-Eleven on Geary & 15th:
First let me clarify that this five star review has been graded on a curve in which only 7-elevens have been evaluated. Sure, perhaps they could do some things better, but it is by far my favorite 7-eleven I have ever visited.
There are a few reason they get five stars:
1. Its a convenience store. So I want it to be f*ing Convenient!!!! Open 24 hours and right across the street from my house; that is as convenient as it gets. They have never been out of stock of anything I need, and their Slurpee station is always clean. They give me whole roles of quarters for laundry. When it's busy and there is only one person working, they will jump back and forward from register to register. That is service.
2. The flatmates and I come home at nine in the morning. Dresses, six inch heels, and smeared eyeliner. The walk of shame at it's finest. The cab drops us off and we walk across the street to 7-eleven. The man at the counter greets us with "Life is good! Life is good!" Isn't it such. The last thing we needed was to be judged by the 7-eleven staff. He assured us life is good, thus also assuring us we could come in and buy a six pack at 9am, condoms at 4am, and a pound of nacho cheese at 3am.... if we ever wanted to do any of those things.
3. Customer appreciation Day! A few months back they had customer appreciation day. They gave out free slurpees, soda, chips, hot dogs, energy drinks and donuts. Best of all they were happy to give it away. The staff was loving it!! They really enjoyed putting a smile on all their customers' faces. Also I have secretly been wanting to try a hot dog from here for 13 years, but have not been able to bring myself to buy one. It just, well, seemed gross. But if they are giving them away.... why not. I have said it before and I will say it again, I will try anything that is free. I told people it was "pretty good" as I was too embarrassed to admit that I thought a hot dog from 7-eleven was beyond delicious.
4. The staff is fantastic. They make me feel like I am not at a 7-eleven but at a local bodega. In fact, sometimes when I go across the street here for something, I ask my roommates if they want anything from the bodega (east coast term for convenience store). Sure maybe it would be nice to support some local store. I fully agree, that MAYBE it would. But, the 7-eleven staff here does it up proper making me feel like I already am. Plus they don't sell liquor, so obviously I am pumping some funds into the local liquor store owners' pockets too.
There are a few reason they get five stars:
1. Its a convenience store. So I want it to be f*ing Convenient!!!! Open 24 hours and right across the street from my house; that is as convenient as it gets. They have never been out of stock of anything I need, and their Slurpee station is always clean. They give me whole roles of quarters for laundry. When it's busy and there is only one person working, they will jump back and forward from register to register. That is service.
2. The flatmates and I come home at nine in the morning. Dresses, six inch heels, and smeared eyeliner. The walk of shame at it's finest. The cab drops us off and we walk across the street to 7-eleven. The man at the counter greets us with "Life is good! Life is good!" Isn't it such. The last thing we needed was to be judged by the 7-eleven staff. He assured us life is good, thus also assuring us we could come in and buy a six pack at 9am, condoms at 4am, and a pound of nacho cheese at 3am.... if we ever wanted to do any of those things.
3. Customer appreciation Day! A few months back they had customer appreciation day. They gave out free slurpees, soda, chips, hot dogs, energy drinks and donuts. Best of all they were happy to give it away. The staff was loving it!! They really enjoyed putting a smile on all their customers' faces. Also I have secretly been wanting to try a hot dog from here for 13 years, but have not been able to bring myself to buy one. It just, well, seemed gross. But if they are giving them away.... why not. I have said it before and I will say it again, I will try anything that is free. I told people it was "pretty good" as I was too embarrassed to admit that I thought a hot dog from 7-eleven was beyond delicious.
4. The staff is fantastic. They make me feel like I am not at a 7-eleven but at a local bodega. In fact, sometimes when I go across the street here for something, I ask my roommates if they want anything from the bodega (east coast term for convenience store). Sure maybe it would be nice to support some local store. I fully agree, that MAYBE it would. But, the 7-eleven staff here does it up proper making me feel like I already am. Plus they don't sell liquor, so obviously I am pumping some funds into the local liquor store owners' pockets too.
Review of The Hearth:
This place is a disaster. The bartender was rude to me apparently because I was "too drunk"... and I had not even said a word! Really, not a word, and I could walk, so how bad could I have been? I just walked in the door. Honey, if your going to judge a person because they are drunk, you're in the wrong effing business.
Review of The Lusty Lady Lounge:
I have been here twice. One time my friend had "her first lesbian experience" and the other time one of my friends stepped in cum. Need I say more??? Well... maybe I should elaborate on the shenanigans.
Night #1: There are about 6 of us girls doing the north beach bars. We are drunk in its fullest form and are not ready for the party to stop. Being the brilliant and sophisticated women that we are we come up with a genius plan. "Lets go to a strip club!" "YA, lets go!!" "whooo hooo!!" So we walk over to Hustlers. Seeing that it was way too pricey we opt out. Us girls keep it classy and see that next door The Lusty Ladies is FREE to get in. Score.
So we all cram into a booth not knowing what to expect. It took us a second to realize the dollar machine. We put in a dollar and we can now see through the window. Inside is just a big room of lusty ladies, when the window shutter goes up the ladies come over. Then time is up shutter goes down. Another dollar goes in. Needless to say this is a blast for us drunks. These ladies did not spark my interest in women...and I was drunk. But it's a peep show where for a buck you can see it all and to each his own, right?. So in that respect the girls were fab. We were all having a great time when suddenly the door opens and two strange girls just walk in and start making out with my friend and enjoying our party. Let's just say... the lusty ladies were getting a show of their own. This was our cue to leave. So we did...most of us. 20 minutes later my friend runs out yelling, "I just had my first lesbian experience! Those girls just walked right in and started making out with me!! They never even said anything. That was so awesome". That deserves a star even if we all know she lied about it being her first lesbian experience.
Night #2: It began in the same exact manner as night number one but with more people. A few forked up the cash to go to Hustlers. The rest of us went into Lusty Lady. Many of us not being interested in going into a booth set up camp in the lobby instead. Yes, we had a mini party in the lobby of The Lusty Lady Lounge and it was fabulous. No one told us we were loitering or being too loud so that is a plus. One of my friends went straight into a booth. After some amusing Lusty Lady lobby banter I went to the bathroom. The bathroom is right off the lobby at the end of a small hallway. The door to this one bathroom is of saloon fashion. Just two swinging doors that touched neither the ceiling nor the floor. Sure, the whole establishment is filthy, but the bathroom just about sobered me up. No woman wants to use this kind of bathroom while a line of men fresh out of the whacking booth wait just outside while your dressed in a skirt and cleavage friendly shirt. I use the bathroom as quickly and discreetly as possible and go back to my party to suggest perhaps we party PG-13 at my house. Just then my friend comes running out of a booth in the most dramatic fashion imaginable. I don't really hear her because I am trying to figure out why in the world was she barefooted and her shoes are clear across the room. Then I realize what she is yelling repeatedly.... "I JUST STEPPED IN CUM!!"
Once the laughter died down and asked why, WHY, would she take her heals off HERE, she simply and ever so matter-of-factly stated, "My feet hurt".
You get what you pay for here people.
Pros: Free to get in and you can do what you please, if you please, inside the booths.
Cons: Spend 20 minutes in a booth and you could have gone else where and stayed longer. Its a place that requires a jizz cleaner and that explains enough.
Night #1: There are about 6 of us girls doing the north beach bars. We are drunk in its fullest form and are not ready for the party to stop. Being the brilliant and sophisticated women that we are we come up with a genius plan. "Lets go to a strip club!" "YA, lets go!!" "whooo hooo!!" So we walk over to Hustlers. Seeing that it was way too pricey we opt out. Us girls keep it classy and see that next door The Lusty Ladies is FREE to get in. Score.
So we all cram into a booth not knowing what to expect. It took us a second to realize the dollar machine. We put in a dollar and we can now see through the window. Inside is just a big room of lusty ladies, when the window shutter goes up the ladies come over. Then time is up shutter goes down. Another dollar goes in. Needless to say this is a blast for us drunks. These ladies did not spark my interest in women...and I was drunk. But it's a peep show where for a buck you can see it all and to each his own, right?. So in that respect the girls were fab. We were all having a great time when suddenly the door opens and two strange girls just walk in and start making out with my friend and enjoying our party. Let's just say... the lusty ladies were getting a show of their own. This was our cue to leave. So we did...most of us. 20 minutes later my friend runs out yelling, "I just had my first lesbian experience! Those girls just walked right in and started making out with me!! They never even said anything. That was so awesome". That deserves a star even if we all know she lied about it being her first lesbian experience.
Night #2: It began in the same exact manner as night number one but with more people. A few forked up the cash to go to Hustlers. The rest of us went into Lusty Lady. Many of us not being interested in going into a booth set up camp in the lobby instead. Yes, we had a mini party in the lobby of The Lusty Lady Lounge and it was fabulous. No one told us we were loitering or being too loud so that is a plus. One of my friends went straight into a booth. After some amusing Lusty Lady lobby banter I went to the bathroom. The bathroom is right off the lobby at the end of a small hallway. The door to this one bathroom is of saloon fashion. Just two swinging doors that touched neither the ceiling nor the floor. Sure, the whole establishment is filthy, but the bathroom just about sobered me up. No woman wants to use this kind of bathroom while a line of men fresh out of the whacking booth wait just outside while your dressed in a skirt and cleavage friendly shirt. I use the bathroom as quickly and discreetly as possible and go back to my party to suggest perhaps we party PG-13 at my house. Just then my friend comes running out of a booth in the most dramatic fashion imaginable. I don't really hear her because I am trying to figure out why in the world was she barefooted and her shoes are clear across the room. Then I realize what she is yelling repeatedly.... "I JUST STEPPED IN CUM!!"
Once the laughter died down and asked why, WHY, would she take her heals off HERE, she simply and ever so matter-of-factly stated, "My feet hurt".
You get what you pay for here people.
Pros: Free to get in and you can do what you please, if you please, inside the booths.
Cons: Spend 20 minutes in a booth and you could have gone else where and stayed longer. Its a place that requires a jizz cleaner and that explains enough.
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